AI can take my job. I can't do this anymore.

Best of luck waking up 7 A.M on Mondays, logging in to work and telling in those 10 am scrum meetings “I’m still wOrking on the sAme tiCket as last friDay.”

Enjoy my job graybot.

I’m gonna go outside and remember what sunlight looks like. Maybe touch grass. Maybe grow crops. Maybe herd some cows. Idk. Might start a farm or might scream into the wind.

I fucked up.

In my career, colleagues always looked up to me to solve everything. From day 1.
Hell, I have nicknames; « The Dad », « Machine », « The Beard »... when I meet a new group of devs at the bar they use those nicknames even if I have no clue who they are.

Result? I'm not allowed to fail and even if I do and try to take responsibility, no one ever blame me.

They see me as a fucking zen programming monk, all wise, patient and kind.

Oh boy here we go. I screw things up all the time and can never let go the guilt since I'm not allowed to take responsibility of my mistakes.

Once again I wake up after a night of stress working, trying to overcome analysis paralysis. I'm late. Supposed to have meetings with some fucking PHDs, fueling my imposter syndrome.

Can't even learn anything in those conditions.

Fuck they should call me the fraud.

I wish this place had a sound proofed dark room where they play "Dust in the Wind" on never ending loop so I can scream and cry.