Learning soft skills.

I'm about as direct with coworkers and managers as I am on devRant. And I still think being painfully direct is often better than playing the heavily politicized office game of thrones.

But sometimes it's better to say:

"CTO, I think we need your skills to build bridges to other departments and manage recruitment. You're the only one who understands both technology and people, so drop your developer role and become our ambassador"

Instead of:

"Dear CTO, your code makes my eyes bleed. Your CS degree was a fucking waste of tax money, and it's quite clear that cheap college beer washed out all of your reasoning skills. We should fill the space you're taking up with a beanbag chair, because you're providing negative value to the company. How many investor cocks did you have to deep throat to get where you are?"

Now, I just pick option one, smile politely, and tell him we need to increase department budget as indemnification for having to work with a retard like him. Uh I mean... "to get developer salaries up to a competitive level so we can retain knowledge"

The latest and greatest bullshit at the workplace: when you're asked to be an 'ambassador'. This really just translates to: 'take on more work for free'.

Whenever management approaches you with 'honorable extra role', immediately ask how it's compensated and definitely don't do it for no extra benefits (a raise should be default).

Don't fall into the trap.

This is my most awkward interview experience. I still shudder just thinking about what happened

When I was in uni I applied for a ‘student ambassador’ role at Microsoft. I went to the interview and it turned out to be group interview with at least 10 other people, we all get taken to a room where we sit around a table with the interviewer. She was friendly and asked us each to introduce ourselves and talk about a talent we have.

When my turn comes I introduced myself and revealed that my ‘talent’ was that I can rap, this is where I fucked up because the interviewer then asked me to rap a song in front of the whole group.

I got very nervous but still gave it a shot, midway through my song due to my nerves I forget the lyrics, a complete brain fart. I abruptly stop rapping and everyone is staring at me, it’s pin drop silence for a good 10 seconds

The interviewer then says thanks for trying and the rest of it is really a blur. I think everyone in the room was embarrassed alongside me so we all pretended like that did not just happen. Needless to say I didn’t get the job

"Design is the silent ambassador of your brand." - Paul Rand

Fuck Swift. Such a garbage language. The last 3 days I tried multiple web server implemented in Swift for mocking API's and none of them worked. Old, not maintained, wrong documentation, wrong code examples and just low quality shit.
Finally I decided to not give a crap and move to use Wiremock and it works out of the box, start and configuration is a breeze and it just plainly works. I should have done that from the beginning.

Btw., as a warning these were the frameworks I used and you should avoid them if possible: Swifter, Embassy, Ambassador and Succulent.

So I have to record a video on why I should be a brand ambassador. I've researched the company, and know I should be confident and show I'm social, but any suggestions on how you think I should be unique so I stand out?

You ever try to get some cool dev swag? Stickers, t-shirts, maybe a notebook that makes you feel like a real hacker while you’re just writing TODO lists? Yeah, good luck.

First, you gotta jump through a thousand hoops. "Complete this 5-hour coding challenge!" "Sign up for our newsletter, then confirm via email, then sacrifice a goat under the next full moon!" And the worst part? Some of these companies ghost you harder than a bad Tinder date.

Google Cloud Arcade? Completed 10 challenges. No swag.
Hacktoberfest? Contributed to open-source. Shirt never arrived.
Random Twitter giveaway? Retweeted, liked, followed, tagged three friends. Crickets.

But the moment you don’t want swag? BAM—your mailbox is drowning in random recruiter postcards from companies you've never heard of.

And let’s talk about those "exclusive" ambassador programs. They dangle swag in front of you like a carrot, but guess what? The only people who get in are LinkedIn influencers who say "🚀 Keep learning! Stay hungry! Stay foolish!" 50 times a day.

At this point, I’d rather just pay $5 for a sticker pack than deal with all this nonsense. But no, these companies make it seem like getting a free T-shirt is harder than getting a job at FAANG.

Just give me my damn stickers!

HOW TO GET A PROFESSIONAL BITCOIN RECOVERY EXPERT HIRE SPARTAN TECH GROUP RETRIEVAL

Website: h t t p s : / / spartan tech group retrieval . o r g

WhatsApp: + 1 ( 9 7 1 ) 4 8 7 - 3 5 3 8

Telegram: + 1 ( 5 8 1 ) 2 8 6 - 8 0 9 2

Flying over mountain tops and cruising above crystal blue oceans, I capture the world from a drone's-eye view. Precision is my business, both in cinematography and in safeguarding my finances. That is, until the day both crashed, literally. I had securely saved $480,000 in Bitcoin on a hardware wallet stored safely inside my drone case. My plan was foolproof. Or so I thought. It was a standard flight over a picturesque Icelandic lake. The sun was setting impeccably over the rolling water, that Holy Grail of cinematic gold. I was midway through the flight, controlling the drone with the finesse of a virtuoso, when a savage North Atlantic gust of wind turned my concerto into a catastrophe movie. My drone dropped from the sky with a dramatic splash that would have won an award for best special effect if it was not my wallet sinking along with it.Cue panic. I was on the lakeshore, staring into the void, balancing the odds of swimming into hypothermia with the prospect of recovering my digital fortune. Spoiler alert: I opted for hypothermia. Three freezing dives later, I surfaced empty-handed and 100% convinced I had just donated my Bitcoin to Poseidon. Defeated, trembling, and contemplating a career change, I recalled another pilot at a tech conference raving about SPARTAN TECH GROUP RETRIEVAL. Desperation led me to call, still wrapped in a towel like a damp burrito. From that first call, their crew reacted to my situation as though it was a search-and-rescue mission. Not only were they tech-savvy, they knew my universe, my language, my horror. With a blend of satellite positioning, sonar mapping, and some technological Spartan that I still don't fully understand, they helped pinpoint the approximate location of my underwater drone. More incredibly, they remotely pulled the wallet details from my water-logged device, defying the laws of nature and logic. Two weeks later, they sent my Bitcoin back to me, like returning a set of lost car keys. I nearly cried. No, wait, I actually cried. Tears of happiness. My drone is in the air again today, my wallet is securely backed up (on land), and my faith in humanity (and technology) is soaring. SPARTAN TECH GROUP RETRIEVAL, not only did you retrieve my Bitcoin, you restored my sanity. Count me as your forever flying ambassador.