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Worst part of being a dev?
The last 10% of a project.
Being in beta, gathering feed back, sorting through opinions and user preferences. All that takes forever compared to the first 90%.
📈🗓❗️❗️❗️2 -
Story time
I really love helping and teaching others about code. Recently I had a friend that wanted to get into web development. Being me, I told him that i would teach him all he wants but that he needs to do some research first to show me that he feels comfortable with as a minimum requirement. I told him to research the minimum technologies required to build a web page and to tell me about the request response cycle and stuff like that. When he came back I was expecting small explanations such as "html stands for bla bla and is used for bla bla".No. this dude comes back all proud to tell me about flipping Laravel. I sit there quietly listening to him go on about the "Laravel programming language". He likes anime, I like kendo (and have trained in it) so while he is talking I slowly move us into the part of my office where I keep my boken (wodden sword). As soon as he sees me sitting down with the sword he asks what am i doing with it.
"Well, remember when in some anime that you like you see teachers beating their studets over stupid shit?"
"What?"
..."WHAT DOES HTTP STANDS FOR?"
"The...the err the web language that.. er"
BOINK
"what is javascript?"
"Like the updates thing?"
HARDER BOINK
:) guarantee he wont forget what http is after that and what js and Laravel are from now on :) needless to say he will continue learning with much more care.
Coding dojo for real mofockas, ya dig?3 -
Listening to a song 500 times on repeat because it will take to long to stop what you are doing and hunt for a new playlist/station....1
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Battling our contracted IT guys about forcing ESET antivirus onto all of our machines. Just looked at Task Manager to find that it was using 1.6+ GB of RAM on my machine! grrrr !!!!!
7 -
There are few developer who name their functions all wrong, but the functionality is fine. Then there comes those who name their functions right but the functionality is nothing close to what it says. There is this function I debugged. It's name is optimizeQuery. It does not optimize the query at all. Rather dismantles it. Also it made it's way to the production. 😅 Now I have to correct and optimize the optimizeQuery.4
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So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:
"Does minified javascript improve performance?"
This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:
"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]
Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]
It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]
So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"
So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...2 -
Pitching Preact for a client. They wanted us to use Dojo because they bought support for it and I was like OH HELL NO FUCK NO
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I got accepted into the University of Washington BS Computer Science & Software Engineering program today! It's been a long road since starting ITT Tech 3 years agofor a BAS in SDEV, it closing on me, starting all the way over at community college, maintaining a 4.0, and now a bootcamper at Coding Dojo. Now only at least 2 more years to go! 😁🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃😩1
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Floating point numbers! 😖
Writing geometric algorithms for CNC machining... you'll find those 10th decimal place inconsistencies real quick!1 -
Imagine supporting blackbox software that still uses practices from the 1980s - unreadable 5 string DB2 column names, a custom piece of shit language you have to edit in what is essentially an Excel editor live on the server, etc.
Even better, the company that supports it has 6 month fix/release turnarounds. Six months in 2017! -
I'm writing a minor productivity app which consumes and modifies a vbscript file on a network drive which apparently gets included in other productivity tools to drive the business, as well as updates the relevant DNS entry the field is associated with, and because I care about making the world a better place now writes the data out to what I hope becomes the authoritative source for said data which eventually replaces these who-the-knows-why-they-are-there network drive files and snippets.
The tool removes the need for an ISP tech in the field to make TWO phone calls when they update network equipment. One for the vbscript tweak, one for the DNS update.
Oh, did I mention that some PHP app under a L1 helpdesk guy's desk that the company has made absolutely necessary for their business (and I subsequently moved to a god damn server) consumes the vbscript file and parses it into something PHP can understand?
You can't make this shit up.
The only saving grace is that I have my team rewriting all of this ridiculous shit in Haskell. Type safety and long term refatorability will keep us sane. -
Just wasted 3hrs trying to figure why a TabContainer is taking 0px height and 0px width. Solution- override resize() and don't do anything in it. Hatred towards DOJO to a new height.
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So I am a mentor at a coder-dojo, basically every 2 weeks a bunch of software developers meet in order to help kids from 8 to 17 with their first coding projects.
This one time the mother of one of the kids came up to me and askes me on how she, no technical background at all, could build her own website with a small webshop.
She told me she heard about wordpress and asked me if I could help her set it up at her Laptop.
Took us quite some time to set it up and after I was finished, she seriously asked if creating the homepage would be as hard as setting up..1 -
Your language has nulls. Would rather smash my own skull in with a mechanical keyboard with blue cherry switches so everyone can hear because omg how do you even get by.
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CODE DOJO
yesterday a had a code dojo firt time in my life. do y like code dojo? do y have some good advices? because i would like to organize code dojo in our firm.3 -
Cove Martial Arts Academy: The Best Taekwondo Classes in Brownsboro, AL
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