Breaking Bad, European edition

You can be jealous, it's fine.

Error Messages These Days:

Programmer: (holds up bloody fingers)
Programmer: Something went wrong!

Police Officer: Yes wow. Who did this to you?

Programmer: Something went wrong!

Police Officer: Yeah but what? How? Who???

Programmer: Something went wrong!
Programmer: Something went wrong!
Programmer: Something went wrong!
Programmer: Oh snap! :c
Programmer: (faints from blood loss)

Remember kids, if you can’t into C, you suck. But if you can’t into CSS, CSS sucks.

How is MSSQL so popular? "Oh yeah, sometimes you have to use dynamic SQL because the compiler doesn't correctly detect the impact of DDL commands and rejects working code" god fucking what? Why does the compiler infer the future structure of tables after a DDL command if it can't do so reliably? In my world, if it becomes public knowledge that a compiler incorrectly infers something, the maintainer scrambles to remove the inference instead.

I also find it surreal that I have to disengage versioning on a table in order to be able to modify the version history. Like surely, there should be a mechanism to temporarily skip the hooks other than ALTERing the table into a regular unversioned database table and then ALTERing it back, rebuilding the versioning infrastructure from scratch. SQL is awful and MSSQL is doubly awful.

— Et tu, Brute…
— Quit talking French, salad boy! *stab* *stab*

TIL json can't encode NaN or +/-inf. wtf!?...

Our ex-employee wrote an amazing SQL SELECT-query consisting of 6449 characters. It has 11 JOINS and takes a solid minute to execute.

The table it fetches from has 16 records and the SQL query returns 46857 records and it was production code lmao

Doing some JavaScript right now and holy moly is this one spaghetti ass language

Promises referencing closures referencing local variables referencing message handlers referencing resolve callbacks referencing ... 😵‍💫

Enter BIOS menu
See the option called something like “ionic capacitor discombobulation”
Click “help” near the option to learn what the hell that is
“Enables or disables ionic capacitor discombobulation”
ffs

TL;DR : I did not read the fucking manual.

Story :

We have a particular kind of setup with Blazor Server-side. And it does not use any SQL, bbut calls APIs.

The class to call APIs was scoped to create one new HTTP connection per new tab (even if the user opens a new tab, it's a new HttpClient).

We were fine. I read that we have 65k ports and disposal takes around 2 minutes, and we have around 1000 users. So it went into the "backlog, where things go to die."

Hard core duiscovery in the past 2 days.

Azure service plan for webapps only allows you 128 outbound connections!

System, we reboot it manually every 4 hours, while I'm working to make HttpClient unique lol

I just needed a break and vent. And "Hey kids, know that Azure service plan is only 128 sockets, not 65536."

I think most devs have burnout. I do. lol

I just got blocked on chess.com because some british guy blundered away like three pieces in a row and I went "blimey! the brexit geezer gambit!"

simple as.

Petition to add a “🤡” reaction to LinkedIn.

fixing the 5th bug this week that stems from liberal use of First() on enumerables that are unlikely but not in any way guaranteed to be non-empty.

When you think about it.. we, DevOps, are the Mario Bros of the tech world.

We do the building, maintenance and pipelining so that whatever shit developers produce, it would end up in the right place w/o getting stuck

Dev life is depressing:

Application Status

Total Applications: 20

Open: 1

Closed: 19

Total Responses

Received: 13

Pending: 1

No Response: 5

Application Progress

Initial Screen Results

Passed: 5

Failed: 9

Pending: 1

None: 5

Assessment Results

Passed: 4

Failed: 0

Pending: 1

None: 15

Interview Results

Passed: 1

Failed: 2

Pending: 1

None: 16

Final Outcomes

Accepted: 0

Rejected: 18

Withdrawn: 0

Pending: 1

Recruitment Reserve: 2

Statistics

Average Response Time: 9.1 days

Percentage of No Response: 25.0%

Applications by Year

2023: 1

2024: 14

2025: 5

Applications by Year and Month

2023-07: 1

2024-01: 1

2024-02: 1

2024-03: 1

2024-04: 1

2024-09: 3

2024-10: 3

2024-11: 2

2024-12: 2

2025-01: 2

2025-02: 1

2025-03: 2

NVD NIST cve CVSS v4 no rating, v3 rating critical vulnerability

description text low severity, no mitigation solution

what the fuck is this , is it critical or not and what the fuck should i do to solve it, what the fuck

Yes, pdf a’s code of some kind is indeed ends with a space, and that space is mandatory. Who let uncle bob specify anything, anything at all?

You should not mock @tosensei too hard. He's a good dude, he just have antiproctocoletism (from greek (ἀντι, πρωκo and κολεῖτης)

(It's a congenital disease that makes your anus looks like a vagina).

Life pro-tip:

Before buying something, always make sure it's made by kid-slaves in a sweatshop. They have very tiny fingers, which means the quality will be over the top, and then the slavery part makes them very dedicated.

So, how do you devs perceive code standards?

Nazi shit or game-changer?

Fuck modern Microsoft.

That moment in the morning you realise today is going to be a shit day

the gratitude of not being in your mentor's position of trapped on fixing an unreproducible issue tied to company's KPIs for months

Want to prevent your Windows PC from ever entering sleep mode? (Okay, okay, I know, you can do it in settings.)

Easy solution: Launch the Amazon Music app. (Without even playing any music, just launching the app prevents sleep mode, lol.)

What dumb developers from Amazon...

If you have 100 hairs out of place nobody notices as it is just your style. However, if you have only one hair out of place everyone will notice it as it is a mistake.

fknshit. Am I stressing about linting and formatting moreso than what the code itself does or is it just another hallucination?

I call it correctness paranoia. Bitch does it even compile. Yes, perhaps, but I absently-minded added a single newline somewhere, and that's no good.

So re-read the diff again: oh.

const auto&
should be
const auto
probably.
F is not returning a ref...
Should it return a ref?

Fuck, I'm declaring this nonref, should I
T N(V)
or
T N = V

Plain old doesn't fucking matter most of the time, but what if I missed a detail somewhere and so it *does* matter here?

REREAD. AGAIN.
SLOWLY.
DYING.
DYING.
DYING.

How can something called SOAP be such filthy shit. No wonder people wanted to build local-only software back then.

Do you know that Microsoft helps the israel rats to genocide Palestinians...

FUCK YOU MICROSOFT AND EVERY RACIST EMPLOYEE THAT HELP THE FUCKING ISRAEL