Just used a laptop without an SSD. I almost died.

I have seen try/catch staments and rest api calls on a class constructor! OMG

I promised a friend to have a look over his dads website to add a small blog. No big deal, I've got it on my drive, can reuse it just need to adapt it to the environment.

I take a look at what I'm working with and I see the most terrifying piece of "Please, take my data" code I could possibly imagine (And I've seen passwords, in plain text in a script tag). I quote "function queryDB(mode, val) {
var query=" ";
if(mode==="findProd")
query="Select * from Products where ProdNam=" +val;
... (same shit for different cases)
sendQuery(query) ;
}

He literally built the query on the client side sent it to a php script (without validation) and inserted it into the database.
You could literally call window.sendQuery with any sql query and get the result printed into the console.
And other than the plain text passwords guy that wasn't some kid someone knew, this was a "Webdesign" Agency.
Now I took the entire thing offline, called my friends dad, explained it to him and try to sort this out. I would not charge a good friends father but that hack will get a quite hefty bill since my hourly rate just tripled.

And the worst thing : If I publicly name that asshole or warn the people in his portfolio I can, according to Google, be sued. (But, and I assume thats vague enough not to count as bad mouthing, if anyone of you has a customer from Rheinland-Pfalz, Germany with a preexisting page, please have a look at the database interface)
I will call that agency tomorrow, ask for a detailed explanation for why they apparently let trained monkeys write their code and anonymously warn everyone in their portfolio about those flaws...

I don't know if I'm cursed or if there are just that many bad devs but it seems that once a year I have to stumble over some "mistakes" that make me question my sanity.

100% Real. And it's not even the worst on the site.

never wrote any unit tests

How to write an antivirus - Twitter user

JS equality is insane

So true

Just when I thought I'd seen the craziest job ad...

Title: Sr. Lead Data Scientist / Python Developer

Required education: bachelor's in CompSci, Math, etc. PhD preferred (lol)

Required experience: 10+ years in Python development

Other requirements: must be under 25 years of age to qualify for funding from EcoCanada (lmao!!!! y'all trippin)

Who is writing these job ads? I swear they get more insane every day.

small reminder: building your own operating system means that you are forced to scan the memory by yourself...

FUCKING HELL PLEASE KILL ME NOW

When the company you work for decides to install a new firewall and the firewall service recognizes stack overflow as a forum site and blocks it.... :/

How to choose your OS? :D

IE's dev tools is the web-dev equivalent to a broken Mad Catz controller. Literally fucking unusable.

!rant

*sigh*
I got rejected today by a company I really wanted to work at. In my opinion the interview went great, but now I feel terrible and defeated.

I keep trying to keep a tough act around my girlfriend..but I feel like crying, so I decided to share this with you guys..

Apparently, clients/managers favorite acronym is ASAP.

Once upon a time, an IT major named adamyeti thought it was a good idea to work on projects directly off of a flash drive with no backup. Halfway through a large ASP.NET project, the drive failed. I fumbled through a free drive recovery tool, but all of the data was scrambled and corrupted.

I ended up having to start from scratch on the project, but I learned my lesson for sure.

Love this guy :)

Happy PI day✌🤘
And
RIP Stephen Hawking😧🙏

So, a friend of mine started working on an internship in which he was supossed to manage a DB. He was given an Excel file. 🙈Wtf

Stephen hawking died on Pi day- the same data that Albert Einstein was born

I'd like to illustrate the development of USB charging standards using this picture.

Being assigned an old system that has scarce/cryptic documentation and uses global variables for everything. Not a maintenance nightmare at ALL.

Ever since i was a little boy, i was fascinated by the stars in the sky and what made them shine. I used to wonder how our universe came in to being. What made it what it is today. What will happen to it long after we re gone. Will it die? Will it live forever? How big is it? Why is it big if it s big and why is it small if it s small. "God did it" was never a satisfying answer for me. God does not play dice as Albert Einstein said. So many questions went through my 10 12 year old mind. Until someone recommended to me the book, "A brief history of time". The book answered a lot of my questions and gave birth to more. Computer science is like my crush. I love it as a friend. But Astrophysics, its the true love of my life. It not only quenches my thirst, but it satisfies my curiosity, while making me more curious. Its an endless cycle. It teaches us that we came from the stars, we go back in the dirt, and only to be returned to the stars again.
Stephen Hawking, his work, his books, taught me so much. Inspired me. Made me more curious. And today the world has truly lost, one of its greatest people.
You will be missed Sir Hawking. RIP.

Bit out of date but I love this JavaScript explanation!

!dev related

went from verizon's ludicrous 210 a month to 165 for 2 lines with t mobile...threw in a samsung s9 for myself, wife will keep her iphone7s plus and I am a happy camper. Why didn't I do this sooner? because fuck me I am an idiot......

So this bloody hilarious, I submit my PWA to windows store, mainly for shits and giggles, see how the whole thing works and all that.

App gets approved, I go in and run another submission to upload a few extra screenshots, at this point they block it as I do not have a privacy policy, but accept user authentication, which is not the case, so after a few days of back and forth I ask them to attach a screenshot, so turns out I need a privacy policy as when the users click on the map link which opens Google Maps in a NEW window, has a sing in button.

According to them, this is 'Opening within my application" and I am apparently able to access user details via google own sign in link, not SSO.

So as a joke, after some frustration I wrote up a privacy policy, what is an even bigger joke is that they accepted it…

This exists solely for the benefit of Microsoft who are having trouble comprehending the fact that RTMS Events does NOT have Authentication.

Microsoft believes that as the application uses Google Maps, and when Google Maps opens a “Sign In” button appears, that I am able to access your personal information.

As any reasonable person will understand, that is not the case, logging into Google Maps/Google for the benefit of using Google Maps in NO WAY gives anyone else access to your personal information.

So to be clear, I do not have any interest or access of any kind to your personal information, should you have any concerns about your privacy, remember, that the “Sign In” button is for Google, not RTMS, take up any issues with them, I am pretty sure they have a REAL and actually NECESSARY privacy policy.

http://rtms.events/privacy.html

........

The lack of human interaction in most dev jobs is really frustrating especially that some companies solve this deficiency with hundreds of meetings per week which is even more annoying.

I hired a woman for senior quality assurance two weeks ago. Impressive resume, great interview, but I was met with some pseudo-sexist puzzled looks in the dev team.

Meeting today. Boss: "Why is the database cluster not working properly?"

Team devs: "We've tried diagnosing the problem, but we can't really find it. It keeps being under high load."

New QA: "It might have something to do with the way you developers write queries".

She pulls up a bunch of code examples with dozens of joins and orderings on unindexed columns, explains that you shouldn't call queries from within looping constructs, that it's smart to limit the data with constraints and aggregations, hints at where to actually place indexes, how not to drag the whole DB to the frontend and process it in VueJS, etc...

New QA: "I've already put the tasks for refactoring the queries in Asana"

I'm grinning, because finally... finally I'm not alone in my crusade anymore.

Boss: "Yeah but that's just that code quality nonsense Bittersweet always keeps nagging about. Why is the database not working? Can't we just add more thingies to the cluster? That would be easier than rewriting the code, right?"

Dev team: "Yes... yes. We could try a few more of these aws rds db.m4.10xlarge thingies. That will solve it."

QA looks pissed off, stands up: "No. These queries... they touch the database in so many places, and so violently, that it has to go to therapy. That's why it's down. It just can't take the abuse anymore. You could add more little brothers and sisters to the equation, but damn that would be cruel right? Not to mention that therapy isn't exactly cheap!"

Dev team looks annoyed at me. My boss looks even more annoyed at me. "You hired this one?"

I keep grinning, and I nod.

"I might have offered her a permanent contract"

void walks into a cave
doesn't return