I've got a great UDP joke, but I'm afraid you wouldn't get it...

IT department of client still doesn't get its shit together. Previously, I've ranted that they insist I access their GitLab through a fucking RDP.

Me: requests an account to their Confluence space

Them: give me a Confluence account. Naturally, Confluence requests that I confirm my email. That needs to be confirmed in the inbox of my.name@theircompany.com. Mail servers hosted by Azure, using Outlook.

Me: ok, let's configure my Outlook, 2FA as they configured to demand it from me... install MS's authenticator app, ok so far so good... Now I'm ready to login and find that email from Confluence and... ERROR 500 INVALID LICENSE

Fucking hell. You just love your siloes so much you actually make it impossible to access it and feel good about my own good will.

!dev

So my boss sent me a facebook request when he used to work with me. He is young, good looking. I kind of had a crush on him.
I didn't like that he sent me the request (he's friends with everyone in the office) but I accepted as it didn't seem a big deal.

Now when he's gone, I sent him a request on another social media( thought it will be safer now), that guy just ignored the request.

Seriously what's wrong with these people. (or with me)

In my freelancing job, I got this as a source code ? Really? Are you guys serious? Is this a joke?

I figured out that I like full stack because I don't like ignorance about software layers, when I know how that record goes from DB to the table in HTML my mind is at piece. 😌

Never ask "How to start with X?". It's a dumb open-ended question with vague open-ended solutions.

Rather ask "I'm at X, want to do Y, I have Z proposed solution. Does that sound good?"

Builds context, focusses on action and is more efficient.

Anyone remembers that in windows XP you coud set any exe as screen saver, and it would run on time, even before you log into any user, as a default system user with administrator privileges?

This motherfucker tried to fuck me!

Ok, here's the full story.
I applied for a quick job as freelancer. He told me I just had to implement stripe payment gateway. After finishing that he asked to save the user data from payment to the database, too. I added that. All the way he wanted me to work on his ugly project on a rotten server through cpanel. But I refused instead I uploaded a showcase environment on my own server.
After he tested my code and all was working as expected he again tried to make me implement the code right away into his retarded project before payment. When I mentioned that he has to pay me first he started bitching that he won't pay in advance.

At this point I left that fucker. Knowing that my feeling was right and this bitch never had the intention to pay for my work. He just wanted to steel my code.

Fuck you. I hope you get eaten in your bed by very hungry slugs one day. Like this one guy here on devrant.

The most expensive electronic thing I ever touched 😁 One of the top variant of Macbook Pro.

It is insane how big it is! My mind is blown away right now.

Would you like to smile for 10 seconds? Read this short story:
*Story begins*
During World War II, numerous fighter planes were getting hit by anti-aircraft guns. Air Force officers wanted to add some protective armour/shield to the planes.
The question was "where"?
The planes could only support few more kilos of weight. Mathematicians were called for a short consulting project.
Fighter planes returning from missions were analysed for bullet holes per square foot.
They found 1.93 bullet holes/sq. foot near the tail of planes whereas only 1.11 bullet holes/sq. foot close to the engine.
The officers thought that since the tail portion had the greatest density of bullets, it would be the logical location for putting an anti-bullet shield.
A mathematician said exactly the opposite; more protection is needed where the bullet holes aren't - that is -around the engines.
His judgement surprised everyone. He said "He said We are counting the planes that returned from a mission. Planes with lots of bullet holes in the engine did not return at all".

Moral: Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted, counts.

Source: From the book -
"How Not To Be Wrong", by Jordan Ellenberg.

I want a name and a gun.

I've had my laptop for over 3 years now. Never, in these 3 years, have I installed Microsoft Teams on it.

I just turned my laptop on, and I now have the Ms Teams icon on my desktop, and Teams has started itself and is asking me to log in.
Control panel says it has been installed today.

I want somebody's head. And then smash it into a pulp with my bare hands and shove that up their ass.

What is the difference between battery and rated capacity. I tried googling and theres a very technically paper with the definitions...

But what does it mean in terms of using it to charge my phone.

#Aliexpress US $6.15 72%OFF | Essager 10000mAh Power Bank Slim USB 10000 mAh Powerbank Portable External Battery Charger Pack For Xiaomi Mi 3 iPhone PoverBank
https://a.aliexpress.com/_sZXhqk

Last 10 years of database leaks.
Will next 10 years will be as interesting in security like last decade ?

Happy new year from Shibuya!
Fucking antifa communists came and ruined it right after new year though..

That first paragraph... Don't think I'm ever going to more truth in one paragraph in my entire life

My friend (not in CS) said his computer was a bit slow.
I told him I'd fix that for 10, he agreed.

I increased the cursor speed.
He bought it.

Do I really need to say why?

**Colleagues Speaking about some political issues**
Me: Why what happened in that council?
Colleagues: Are you living under a rock or what?
Me: No, I have been living inside a shell. Why?
Colleagues: Stared for 5 seconds and continued with their topic.

I so badly want some programmers in my office ☹️

Thin client server side software. What have you experienced and what worked? Main software used is a web browser. But some require office.

Music is annoying.
Listening to music sometimes helps you focus, and other times distracts you because you're too busy "singing".

I was an Android developer in a company, I was told to generate a release APK file to test it locally.

So, to sign the apk, I created a keystore file and the password is my name. they decided to publish the file on Play Store.

I left the company years ago, and still on every update they have to put my name as a password.

I got the internship! 😊

Finally getting my foot in the door! :D

I sold my first app today. I’m 70 cents richer now. ;)

Sometimes I give someone a ++ on here just to bother them with a notification on their phone. It gives me a sense of power.